Wednesday, 16 November 2011

How Child Custody Calendars Can Make Divorce Easier

Many parents find themselves unexpectedly divorced and battling with their former spouse over who spends time with their child and when. The parent that is not awarded primary custody can find this extremely difficult because they no longer get to see their child every day. The days of nightly bedtime stories are over for them. This loss can build itself into anger and resentment that is often misdirected at the other parent. Open communication between both parents and the use of a child custody calendar can soothe the pain.Both parents need to come to an understanding for the well-being of the child but such is not always the case. Even in an amicable divorce, communications can become strained as one parent moves on with their life. A new house, entering the dating scene and even weight loss can spur anger in someone who may now suddenly resent the upheaval that divorce brought to their life. Arguments about something as simple as the child custody calendar can ensue in an attempt to hurt the former partner. Unfortunately, the fights only end up hurting the child caught in the middle. Verbal attacks on one another are often part of these fights but are never the solution.Keeping all important information on a child custody calendar can eliminate some of the stress by having dates and times clearly spelled out for everyone involved. In fact, changes can easily be made by either parent in a way that takes the emotion and the angry phone calls out of the equation. It is especially helpful when the calendar software allows parents to work together without the added expense of a lawyer and without the need for another court appearance. Many calendars also allow for a request to switch weekends, for example, in a non-confrontation way. The parent just types the information in the system and an automatic e-mail or text is created to relay that change request.Divorce can be tough on families but, by using every available tool including child custody calendars, the transition from a two parent family to that of just two separate parents can be a little smoother. Biting one’s tongue and taking the high road is often necessary when one former partner is hurt and lashing out. An open mind and open communication is needed to take everyone to the next level, where each member of the family realizes that divorce only changes who lives where, not who is part of a family.

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